create.

In your life CREATE space to be alone. CREATE space to be together. CREATE space to open up and share the possibilities of connection.

I have for so long struggled to be alone. Loneliness and sadness constantly looms in this space. Its very uncomfortable. Now if you know me you’re saying WHAT?!? You, Lonely? Yes my world is FULL, more full than I can balance at times. In a world of these highs also comes the world of the lows. I know I am not the only one who sits here. But I am one to share openly about it. I discover that when I share, when I connect and when I create a space for others to become vulnerable, it becomes less lonely.

This year gave me the opportunity to explore and create space with many. (all over the world in fact).  Coming off an unexpected surgery into the new year I learned to appreciate my body more. How it heals, how it grows, and how it shares feedback with me. I have learned to appreciate my friendships, my family and those who surround me everyday. I have learned to not feel bad when I can’t spread myself in every direction to connect with every person. I have learned to create alone time. I have learned to create togetherness. I have learned to connect in a bigger way than ever before. I’ve also learned to let go of the things that don’t fill my cup.

I am learning who I am in a deeper way. I am finding my real self. In the loneliness, the sadness, the happiness, the connection, I am learning to balance. I am recognizing the light of my soul as so many books have been telling me to do. Recognizing I am never alone, but connected with the universe (yes I am picturing Betty White in The Proposal when I say that). But it’s true, I am accepting what is, and letting go of what isn’t.

I am far from perfect, heck I never ever plan to be perfect. I do however plan to be perfect in my individuality and I plan to use it and do the things that I have been sent to this earth to do. This new year is going to be huge. Do you feel it!?!

Every year I plan to blog more and every year I have every single intention to do so. Then enters the crazy busy life. This year I AM NOT going to blog more, I am going to live more. I am going to experience more. I am going to CREATE more. I hope you come along for the ride.

Transformation

Today kicks off the 6 week weight loss challenge at Orange Theory Fitness Woodbury! I am stoked to be the captain of Team White! I have some amazing people on my team looking to make their life even better. But not only that, there are over 200 people total between the three teams that are looking to change their lives over 6 weeks and I am super excited to keep them motivated to do that.

Since starting to coach at OTF I have made a lot of lifestyle changes. I workout more, I eat better, I sleep more and I find I am happier than I have been in a long time. I made a big leap when I came to Orange Theory, I left the corporate desk life that I spent 14 years in. I was often unhappy in my own physical body which ultimately affected my mind and how I felt about myself. I was constantly motivating people to be in shape and to eat healthier, yet I didn’t feel I was in the body to preach that.

I am now walking the walk, not just talking.

Since this time last year I am down 20 lbs! I’d be curious what my body fat to muscle comparison was a year ago because I’m sure it would have been an interesting change. The number on the scale is cool, but really when it comes down to weight loss for me it’s about how I feel when I put on my clothes. A few weeks ago I decided to try on all my jeans and found most of them fall off of me (these are jeans I still have from high school/college by the way). Most of my yoga pants are too big too (is that even possible, why yes it is). I have been working on myself everyday and I have noticed little changes, but lately the results are really showing. It has taken time and I have been putting in a TON of work, but every time I look in the mirror, every time I get dressed, every time I work out I feel that much better than I have (probably since I was 14). It has been completely worth sacrificing the junk I used to eat and not skipping my workouts. It’s a lifestyle change really and I am feeling 100 percent better because of it.

I want nothing more than to help people push through the same things I have pushed through and see the results I’ve been able to see. You can do it and once you get there it is much easier than saying tomorrow i’ll do it. Do something today, You got this!

Also, I am participating in the weight loss challenge. My goal is accountability of getting my workouts in and finally losing those stubborn areas my body holds on to 🙂

Day one….I’ll keep you updated on my progress 🙂

 

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Left: One year ago (fall 2016), Right: Last weekend (fall 2017)